This is a poem that I learnt at school when I was eight. You can imagine my mother’s horror when my little sister, aged six at the time, returned from a friend’s birthday party, and the conversation went something like this.
– Did you have a nice time darling?
– Yes Mummy. We all had to do a party piece.
– Oh. Did you sing a song?
– No. I said Lance’s poem.
– Which poem is that darling?
My friend Billy’s got a ten foot willy,
And he showed it to the girl next door.
She thought it was a snake,
And hit it with a rake,
And now it’s only five foot four!
I was in serious trouble!